Posts from — April 2003

If you’re ever curious about the etymology of English sayings or phrases, you might find them at this Origin of Phrases site.

A German-led team of archaeologists have found what they believe to be the tomb of King Gilgamesh, the ruler of Uruk who was immortalised in his famous Epic more than 4500 years ago.

I’m not sure how they managed to do this, as Uruk, of course, is the ancient city from which Iraq gets its name and the remains of the tomb have been found in the middle of what used to be the Euphrates. Nevertheless, a fantastic find and another demonstration of Iraq’s rich history and incredible archaeological value. What a waste.

They’re watching you. So why not create your own conspiracy theory and start watching them.

Visit the Webby Awards page to see the nominee’s for the best web pages out there. There are many categories and I’ve picked my favorites from each. In the Humor category, all of them are hilarious but Odd Todd stands out. For some reason funny noises his characters create make me laugh out loud.

Things are going well for me today. On the way in, nobody cut me off, or tailgated me. Everyone used their blinkers and there was a general attitude of friendliness on the road. Then I woke up and realized I was dreaming.

Some sort of Xbox play site. This one is pretty good.

Everyone loves to play with an Etch-A-Sketch. Have fun with this one.

What’s this Zorb thing? It looks like a lot of fun to me. Didn’t James Bond use one of these once?

From The Broom Closet:
The tech support problem dates back to long before the industrial revolution, when primitive tribesmen beat out a rhythm on drums to communicate:

This fire help. Me Groog

Me Lorto. Help. Fire not work.

You have flint and stone?

Ugh.

You hit them together?

Ugh.

What happen?

Fire not work.

(sigh) Make spark?

No spark, no fire, me confused. Fire work yesterday.

*sigh* You change rock?

I change nothing.

You sure?

Me make one change. Stone hot so me soak in stream so stone not burn Lorto hand. Small change, shouldn’t keep Lorto from make fire.

(Groog grabs club and goes to Lorto’s cave)

Tomorrow begins our long Easter weekend. It will be interrupted by workers installing the basement window first thing in the morning. Tom will be on hand to supervise the work.

I won free tickets to the new movie “Chasing Papi.” I never heard of it. Couldn’t it have been for the new Matrix or X-men movie instead? Even better would be free tickets to see Bulletproof Monk. Then I would be excited.

Plastic has been around for a while and it continues to be a great news and information site. I stop there every once in a while. Read the bit about how Pigeons are getting a lame rap nowadays under the Animals section.

From my assistant: “Your access clearance has been authenticated, sir. Please proceed to Secure Omega, the General and his staff are waiting for your instructions. Sir, may I remind you of your 2 o’clock at the White House, and your 4:30 at the NSA?”

Did I tell you I can see special things with my new sunglasses? I’m driving down the road and every so often I see a car with a purple windshield. There are other cars with funny dots or stripes all over them too. Remember that movie with Rowdy Roddy Piper where he has these sunglasses and can see aliens all over the place? Mine are kind of like that. It’s polarization you say? Nevermind.

The Basement Project is going fine. Most of the framing is done and the electrical boxes are all in place. It was nice configuring extra switches and electrical plugs and lights around the basement where we need them. Tomorrow the Escape Window will be installed. It’s going to be a huge mess but we won’t be home to see any of it. I put some new pictures in the gallery if you care to take a look at what’s going on so far.

Wait. How do you say that in “Engrish?”

Where do these people come from that think speeding in their cars in a neighborhood with kids all over is OK? What’s the big hurry? Slow down you idiots. Do I need to get medieval on your asses?

Shifted Reality. Some very nice wallpaper files are here.

What’s happening in Tech? Visit Slashdot - News for Nerds and find out. Read about the new Matrix Reloaded trailer just released. Have you seen it? The special effects are going to blow everything away. From what I saw, Agent Smith is back along with a few new enemies and returning characters from the first movie. This is way high on my list of the most anticipated movies of the summer. You can download the 100MB trailer from the site while you’re there.

Why say only one sentence when you can speak for 10 minutes about nothing? Don’t bother being concise and to the point. Drag out your explanations to include the history of your life and how whatever you are talking about (I forgot what it was) got invented. Continue to speak so quickly so there are no gaps in your talking where the other person can interject their view. Don’t bother to watch the other person’s body language to see them squirming in their seats, looking around and yawning in an attempt to signal you to SHUT THE FRELL UP! Thank you for your cooperation.

“Multipass, multipass. She knows it’s a Multipass, sweetheart.”

It’s a funny thing. I wasn’t nominated again this year for a Webby award. There are some very good sites in the running, guess I have to wait until next year.

From Wired: Unwired. The revolution is here.

Google is the best site on the Internet. Google Hacks shows you how mine the enormous amount of data it has to offer.

The Iraq-O-Meter.

“This reminds me when I rode the ‘Short Bus’ to school” said Dave as we rode back from lunch. I got a huge bright red van from work to pick up some furniture we bought last weekend. Dave tagged along when I went over to get it. On the way back he reminisced about the happy days he had riding on his short bus. “I wonder why all those other losers have to ride on those stupid long busses. It’s way cooler to ride on the short bus.” Later he did admit to people staring strangely at him when he got off at his special school. Hmmm.

Bad weather ahead. Check the Internet Storm Center for the latest forcast on the state of the Internet. You’ll learn who is vulnerable and under attack. This is a unique look at what’s going on all the time over the net.

Bored? Try this.

Jeff Manus, good luck with your new position.

Thanks JB.

I’ve never missed an issue of Wired magazine. They are celebrating 10 years of publication and I’m happy for them. Over the years I’ve enjoyed countless offbeat, interesting and funny stories from some great writers. From this month’s issue:

Wired: FutureFeedForward. It’s extremely clever and funny.

Tired: The Onion. I disagree. This site consistently comes up with very witty satire.

Expired: Suck. I never got into this online magazine.

Online photo pages are fun to visit. Here is one with a twist. Look down and go over there.

Just a quick reminder: JB you owe me $20. Thanks.

You should revisit the Animatrix site. They released some of the shorts for you to view on your computer. It’s very cool stuff.

The Basement Project is proceeding nicely. The area will be great. All it takes is money. A lot of money. Thankfully we’ll now have a nice place to hang out in our house. And that’s a good thing since we’ll no longer be able to afford to go out.

I’m always looking for a way to tell someone off. Now the Shakespearean Insult page can help. Reload the page for new quotes.

This page will generate Random Elizabethan Curses. It’s my favorite.

If you plan on insulting a geek, try using a Klingon insult instead.