Posts from — May 2004

I basically enjoyed the season finale of Enterprise. The special effects were great but the storyline could have been better.

After watching the ending I was very confused. What is that supposed to mean? I mean really…. Nazis? WTF?

But then I got it!

When the deathstar was blown up, Sam Beckett had saved the Earth and successfully completed this leap. Then he did a quantum leap into his next mission, the body of Dr. Indiana Jones.

Dave has a new website, go over and take a look.

New law: if it’s raining and your wipers are running, turn on your damn headlights. What’s the matter with you people anyway?

Michael enjoys surfing the Internet. Michael could do that all day. I’m going to start referring to myself in the 3rd person.

Note to medical doctors: make appointments more convenient. Lots of people work during the day and it’s hard taking the time off from work to go in. Thanks.

The Chronicles of Riddick looks like it will be a good movie. So does Troy, Van Helsing and I Robot.

1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks’trus) adj. Possessing the ability to turn
the bathtub tap on and off with your toes.

2. CARPERPETUATION (kar’pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when vacuuming,
of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times,
reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back
down to give the vacuum one more chance.

3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt’) v. To sterilize the piece of confection
(lollipop) you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this
will somehow ‘remove’ all the germs.

4. ELBONICS (el bon’iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering for
one armrest in a movie theater.

5. FRUST (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept
onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he
finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.

6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak’ to man gyu lay’ shun) n. Manhandling the
“open here” spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort
to the ‘illegal’ side.

7. PEPPIER (peph ee ay’) n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose
sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they
want fresh ground pepper.

8.PHONESIA (fo nee’ zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number
and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

9. PUPKUS (pup’kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog
presses its nose to it.

10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay’ shun) n. The act of always
letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even
when you’re only six inches away.

So the Saturday before last Pam is on her way home from work. Stopped in traffic, an 18-wheeler rolls into her PT Cruiser. It smashed the backend but luckily Pam was uninjured. The next Monday I take the car into the body shop for repair. A friend from work drove me over there during lunch.

Then I get a car from work to drive while Pam’s car is getting fixed and she drives my Jeep. Everything is fine. PT is getting fixed, I’m riding around in a cool Dodge truck and Pam’s happy with the Liberty.

A week later, the bump shop calls to tell me the car is ready for pickup. Now the fun begins. How do I get the car? We went through all sorts of scenarios trying to determine the best way to pickup the PT, return the loaner truck and get to and from work. A few times it was actually funny the way we were overanalyzing the most convenient way to do all of it.

None of this would have been a problem if it weren’t for the unholy hours Pam has been working. She put in 75 hours last week for some super hot project. The earliest she was getting home was 7:30, well after the closing time of the car repair shop.

Today, both cars are back home and everyone is relieved. Car repair is such a hassle.

“Equipped with unique and gratuitous packaging. Dataguards are available for both
balance ,” said Michael Feldstein, CEO of Frontsideback. Feldstein added, “and
kneel before superior alien technology. VV-97 “Bob-Jones” Splash Ferrule Blast
Reticulators with a scanned coloprobe microscope, with Scuff Opto-Dataguard Accelerometer
Safeties: AcmeVaporware miasma from an estimated frequency of Valtech described
a 1×1x10-nm suspended beam of the Phlogiston casting, eliminating leak points
and deadly Flo-Stop device. NANO-TORPOMECHANICAL SYSTEMS (NTMS) will be used
by our own John Uberhumber’s patented K-series high capacity light-duty blast
pumps. It installs directly onto the one-piece chamber - with unique, deadly
Flo-Stop device. NANO-TORPOMECHANICAL SYSTEMS (NTMS) will be faster, smaller,
and fugitive evaporative network …the rest hasn’t to date reached a level of
conceptual verbalization.”

Go to Acme Vaporware for more.

The new computer arrived late last week. It screams with a 3.0 GHz processor, tons of RAM and a sweet ATI video card. I also added a Sound Blaster Audigy card that’s awesome.

It came with a 15″ LCD monitor that I’ll use with the Apache server. Is it me or do other people find LCD monitor’s VERY cool. When will they ever come down in price? We’d love to get a small flat screen TV for the kitchen but it’s hard spending $600 on one.

With the new system and its heavy-duty video card, I’m finally able to play Far Cry. I’m still on the first level but I can say this is the best videogame I have ever played. The graphics are unbelievable and you’re totally immersed in a great story and lots of action.

MusicPlasma is cool. It’s a neat search engine for music. The interface reminds me of Kartoo.

Pam’s PT was smashed the other day. The damage isn’t too bad, and Pam is OK but it’s a huge hassle going through the repair process. Thankfully I secured a free loaner car while it’s “in the hospital.” On the way home from the repair shop I was behind this rusted junker of a car.

It made me wonder how long this person has been driving around with his car like that. Only 1 of the 3 brake lights worked, the right mirror was missing and the windshield had a huge crack. Maybe it’s time to institute vehicle inspections to get these dangerous pieces of crap off the roads.