Posts from — April 2006

Last Thursday I got called to serve on jury duty. I arrived at the courthouse thinking I would be sitting around all day and that I wouldn’t get called for a trial. But within 45 minutes of arriving I was in the jury box ready to hear a case. The trial involved a man accused of drunk driving and driving with a suspended license.

Last Thanksgiving this man was driving down the back roads of the county when a young couple on their way to Thanksgiving dinner spotted his erratic driving. The family followed the accused for several miles and witnessed him narrowly missing other cars several times. Then he ran into a ditch and destroyed a mailbox. They followed this guy all the way to his house where the police met up with him moments after he arrived.

When confronted by the police, the drunk driver admitted to having a “few drinks” and crashing into the mailbox. He gave himself away before the cop had a chance to ask him anything. Then he tried to trick the Breathalyzer test so he was taken to the hospital for a blood test. They found his alcohol level to be an unbelievable 3 times the legal limit. The man was arrested and spent Thanksgiving night in jail.

At the trial the evidence was overwhelming and we unanimously found him guilty. That is except for one juror. She sympathized with the drunk as she had her licensed suspended for drunk driving. Being the moron she is, the rest of the jurors easily persuaded her to change her vote. All it took was a promise for us to meet at the bar and get drunk that night. Of course none of us showed up but at least we got out of the courthouse right away.

Afterward, the judge told us this was one of the fastest trials he ever had. And he told us we made the right decision. The drunk guy was in front of this judge twice before for the same thing. Three strikes and you’re out.

When I originally got the notice to appear for jury duty, I was pissed. But after going through the experience, I’m glad I was able to participate. Of course its a big inconvenience but I realize now how important the process can be. The judge compared our serving on a trail to the soldiers in Iraq - that we’re doing our duty as Americans. It was an enlightening experience and if I’m chosen to serve again, I’ll have a better understanding of the whole process.

Guest entry from Kristen:
So last night I go to the parent/teacher conference for my oldest daughter Myla. Considering Myla is in the second grade, I am not expecting anything too major to transpire. For instance, I am not worried that Myla is smoking cigarettes in the girls bathroom or writing graffiti in the hallway during study hall. What I am concerned about is Myla’s cursive handwriting techniques and next year’s 3rd grade MEAP test.
I take great pride in both of my daughters (Meg is 4) and am confident this conference will be smooth sailing. I was wrong. Now you know when a teacher starts off by saying: “I am not worried with Myla’s academics at all”, there is some negative feedback to come. Okay, so if your not worried about Myla’s academic - WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT??? And after 15 minutes of small talk we digress into Myla’s snotty attitude. WHAT! NOT MY MYLA…She must be crazy. She gave me a couple examples of Myla’s poor attitude and lack of patience. Shedoesnothavealackofpatience…shehasalotofpatience.
Trust me, I am not one of those mothers. I can’t stand those types of mothers, the ones who think their kid can do no wrong and there must be something wrong with the teacher, types of mothers. And trust me, I encounter those crazy women all of the time. So I tell Myla’s teacher, I can relate with her opinion of Myla’s attitude as I too have encountered Myla’s SNOTTINESS. I furthered my response by stating Myla’s Father and I will definitely address this issue and do everything in our power to reverse this negative behavior. We will start with positive reinforcement and encourage baby steps toward change. GOD AM I GOOD…and the teacher thought I was good as well.

I had a long talk with Myla that evening and we both came to the agreement that she needs an attitude adjustment and we are both going to work handling situations more positively.

My friend Mike C is moving away to start a new job in Florida. I’ll miss having him around, we had some fun times and he made the job a lot less tedious for me. Thanks for putting up with my nonsense, Mike. I hope you enjoyed our short time together, I certainly enjoyed helping you out as much as I could. And while you didn’t always show it, I know you truly appreciated everything. The office already seems too empty without you around.

I hope we can meet again sometime, I’m only a email or phone call away. Try to keep in touch to let me know how you’re doing. Be on the lookout for some Photoshop fun (you should never allow me to take your picture).

Take care and farewell, and don’t be too bougie after you make your fortune.

After long consideration and with advice from Mike C, I decided to get laser vision correction. I was apprehensive about undergoing a procedure that had the danger of damaging my sight. But now, after the surgery, all my fears were unfounded.

I met with the doctor twice before the procedure. Each time complex tests and measurements were taken with extremely advanced equipment. Later, I checked the doctor’s credentials and discovered what Mike already told me; he is at the top of his field. I also read that over 20% of the surgeries he performs are to correct the mistakes by other so-called LASIK doctors. And it was refreshing to have a doctor that actually sits down with you to review your options and go over the procedure without hurrying you along to get to the next patient.

I picked a good time to have the surgery, they were running a special. For $400 more, they offered X-Ray vision enhancement. I figured it would come in handy in a lot of situations so I went for it. Adding it on was my best choice of the entire experience.

As I layed on the table just before he activated the laser I asked the doctor “Will I be able to play the piano after I’m done?” He said “Why yes, Mike. You certainly can play the piano once your eyes fully heal.” I cheefully replied “That’s excellent, doctor. I was never able to play before.” (I know, bad joke.)

So now I have better vision than I had wearing glasses and it’s amazing. I highly recommend it to anyone considering getting it done. And don’t worry, I’m just kidding about the X-Ray vision thing.